The Glitch
by smoldering
Summary: Kaiba and his bitter daughter are somewhere in time and space, Anzu is trying to preach the joys of friendship to a new student, and Jonouchi sees his future... R & R!
1. The Other Self

Author's Note:

This is my first fic. Please be kind. As to flamers--- you can eat fuckin shit! Go ahead with your futile attempts to insult me. _Nothing_ insults me. I don't care. But I would prefer if flamers wouldn't hog up my reviews.

Yes, my username is 'smoldering' and I don't like 'flamers', I'm aware of the parody.

By the way, this fic is rated 'T' because of the language of some characters in the fic, but mostly because of my foul tongue.

Anyway, this is one I thought of at five o'clock this morning, so on with the fic!

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Chapter 1: The Other Self

Jonouchi Katsuya swaggered in the direction of Domino High School, his clothes wrinkled and his school jacket open, as it always was. He practically owned the streets, and he wasn't going to let anyone forget it.

As he walked up the steps to the front doors, he noticed that Anzu was standing outside by herself. She seemed to have just come out, and walked down the steps, daydreaming.

Jonouchi thought this odd. She was almost always with Yugi.

After about a minute, Anzu noticed Jonouchi's presence, and looked at him, confused.

"Oh hey Jonouchi. You and Yugi done having your little talk about fights?"

In response to this, Jonouchi blinked stupidly.

"Anzu, what are you talkin about? I just got here!"

"Now Jonouchi, it doesn't matter what your excuse is. Everyone saw you! You can't pretend you weren't there!"

Another stupid blink.

"Um…Anzu, are you feelin okay today? I just now got here."

The two teens stared at each other for a moment, then Anzu suddenly cried out in anguish, "Oh Jonouchi! You have amnesia! Why do bad things always have to happen to my friends! What's your name? What's my name? How many fingers am I holding up? When's your birthday? Who's your best friend? What's your sister's name? Who's your mortal enemy? What really annoys you? What is the meaning of life!"

She said this all very quickly.

"Ok, in order, Jonouchi Katsuya, Anzu Mazaki, two, January 25, Yugi Motou, Shizuka, Seto Kaiba, you, eating. That's all my answers."

Anzu eyed him warily.

"The _real_ Jonouchi would never be able to remember all of my questions!"

"Hey! I can rememba things just fine! I know the lunch menu from now until December!"

"Now _that_ sounds like the Jonouchi we all know and love. Well, I don't understand what's going on here, but let's go inside with our friends."

They went inside, weaving throughout the hallways, Anzu leading the way to show Jonouchi where the gang was hanging out today. Granted, she was still very confused, but was forced to accept that it really was Jonouchi and not some trick of another psychopathic maniac hell-bent on taking over the world. Only the real Katsuya Jonouchi could accomplish a feat like memorizing the lunch menu for the next three months.

"What are we having for lunch…November 24th?" she asked, just to make sure.

"Pizza."

"December 2nd?"

"Sushi."

"October 12th?"

"It's the weekend."

"Damn you're good."

"I take pride in knowing my food", Jonouchi replied smugly, just as they turned the corner, into the hallway where their friends were. What they saw made everyone freeze instantly.

It was Jonouchi. But, it wasn't Jonouchi. Jonouchi was standing at the end of the hall with Anzu. However, he was also standing with Yugi, Honda, Otogi, and Shizuka. Both Shizuka and Yugi were reprimanding Jonouchi for getting into yet another fight. Honda and Otogi were standing back, gaping over Shizuka's form, though every time she turned back to look at them they would immediately take 'casual' poses.

"Oh. My. God. There's two Jonouchis! What the hell?" Anzu said, getting attention from Yugi and friends, who had not yet become aware of her presence. They looked between the two Jonouchis.

"I suspect dark magic is at work here", said Atemu from his soul room. Yugi shook his head.

"I don't think so. I think this was unintentional."

"Hey Jonouchi, did you get stuck in the cloning machine?" Honda asked.

"How is it possible that they could both be Jonouchi?" wondered Atemu.

"I don't know, but it is. I think that they really are both Katsuya Jonouchi", Yugi replied.

Jonouchi walked up to his other self, mouth slightly ajar, then poked the other to ensure he was real.

"Ow! Don't do that!" said the other Jonouchi (to ease the confusion, we'll call the other Jonouchi 'Katsuya' and our Jonouchi 'Jonouchi') "I am you one day from now."

Jonouchi looked at what he would look like one day from now. Katsuya had a black eye, many bruises, and cuts on his face.

"What the hell happened to you? I mean me? And how can you be me tomorrow if you're here?"

"It's a long story. In the future, a gang was goin to beat you up as you went home today and steal your rarest cards. So, I came back in time to prevent it from happenin, and beat up the three thugs who were goin to beat you up later today", Katsuya replied.

The others comprehended all right, but this information went _way_ over Jonouchi's head.

"Well, wouldn't you need a time machine or somethin to come back here?" Jonouchi asked, after a moment of vainly attempting to work things out.

"Yeah, I used a time machine."

"They master the flow of time in the next 24 hours?" Anzu asked.

"Yeah, dis scientist creates three time machines--- a prototype dat he gives to da museum, one dat he keeps for himself, and one dat he gives to da government. Last night…er, tonight, after I get beat up, I break into da museum and steal it. It isn't easy; I almost get caught. But den, out in the street, I was almost home, when dis guy grabs me and pulls me in an alley. He knew I had da time machine. He said to give it to him cause meddlin wit time is dangerous. It was the guy who created it, and he said he was gonna destroy them and then kill himself, cause he was the only one who knew how to make em, ya know? Well, I still wanted revenge and I came back here. I'm surprised it worked; I don't even know how da thing operates."

" 'Operates'? Hey Jonouchi, you learn a new word between now and tomorrow", Honda sneered.

"Aw, shut up, Honda! So you don't know how to get back to da future?"

"Wait till tomorrow, I guess?" Katsuya suggested.

"No, you can't stay here!" piped up Shizuka suddenly, "You have to go back to your own time, or you could throw the fabric of time and space off-balance! You shouldn't meddle with time, big brother. I mean, what would people think if they saw two Jonouchis?"

"Don't worry Shizuka, I'll go back. There was just something I had to take care of. I had to change the future. And as soon as I figure out how this time machine works, I'll go."

"Well, let us see it. Maybe we can help you figure it out. I mean, Yugi figured out the Millennium Puzzle. What are friends for?" said Anzu cheerily.

From the inside of his school jacket, Katsuya pulled an hourglass, filled with tiny, shimmering golden grains of sand.

"It's so pretty", Shizuka murmured.

"Well, here, let me see it", said Anzu, reaching out to take it. Suddenly, Katsuya pulled it back, clutching it to his chest, glaring at her.

"No! You can't have it! You won't give it back! It's mine! MY PRECIOUS!"

Everyone sweatdropped.

"You can trust _me_. I'm you, after all. You can trust yourself", said Jonouchi.

"Well…dat makes sense, I guess", Katsuya replied, reluctantly handing Jonouchi the time machine.

Jonouchi looked over the time machine for a few seconds, when suddenly, there was a golden flash, and a sound like an explosion, as Jonouchi disappeared and everyone was knocked to the ground, unconscious.

-----

Author's Note: It was okay, I guess. It'll get better.


	2. Too Long a Title to fit here

Author's Note:

I will try to control my language, and that of the characters, but sometimes it is understandable for them to curse.

-----

Chapter 2: Jonouchi, the Time Machine, and the Guy in the Overcoat

Anzu sat up, having lost consciousness a few minutes earlier.

"Where did my brother go?" Shizuka was asking Katsuya. The boy shrugged.

"I dunno. He must have got transported somewhere on accident. It's da same thing dat happened to me. He could be anywhere in time or space."

Tears welled up in Shizuka's eyes. "Can you bring him home, my-brother-one-day-from-now?" Katsuya scratched his head.

"No, I think dat he has to come back on his own. Hopefully he…I mean I…whateva. Hopefully he'll figure out how ta use the time machine."

"Jonouchi, this is you we're talking about", said Anzu.

"Wha…? Hey!" He simmered as the others (who were all awake, by the way) laughed.

Suddenly, there was a similar explosion to the one when Jonouchi had disappeared. And everyone was knocked out…again.

But rather than being out for five minutes, they were out for four. When they woke, they saw a man wearing all black standing before them, shades covering his eyes, a long black overcoat making his form look huge and looming.

"It's you!" he said, pointing to Katsuya, "Return the time machine. Please…I need to destroy them."

"I don't have it", Katsuya replied, "The past version of myself accidentally transported himself…myself. Whateva."

Cursing, the man pulled his own time machine out of an inside pocket of his coat. It looked exactly the same as Katsuya's, except this one had silver grains of sand instead of gold.

"To locate his coordinates…" the man murmured. Without warning, he walked over to Katsuya and pulled out a strand of the boy's blonde hair.

"Ow! What the hell…?"

"Since it was your past self that took the time machine, I'll use the DNA sample from your hair to track him."

"Wow, dat's some pretty deep stuff. You must be really smart ta think of stuff like dat."

"Well, he is the genius who discovered the secret of time travel!" Anzu pointed out, marveling at how dense her friend could be sometimes.

"Hey, you're makin me feel stupid", Katsuya replied.

"Well, it's not hard", said Honda.

While Katsuya tried to strangle Honda, Anzu and Yugi turned to the scientist, who had his back turned to them and was doing something with the time machine.

"Um…excuse me?" said Yugi, "But do you know where Jonouchi is yet?"

"Dark magic!" said Atemu from his soul room, "It's part of a sinister plot to take over the world! Let me duel him! We'll do mind crush, and then see what he thinks about sending Jonouchi to the Shadow Realm!"

"Atemu, stop it. You're overreacting. Yesterday, you thought the teacher giving me an 'F' on my history test was a sign of Dark magic. And the day before that, you wouldn't let me eat lunch because you thought the lunch ladies were plotting to take over the world!"

"But the lunch ladies are trying to take over the world!" Atemu protested.

"Atemu, just admit it, you overreact."

Yugi accidentally said the sentence out loud, rather than in his head, and the scientist looked at him, confused.

"What are you kid, mental? Well, I've tracked him down. By the way, go hide in a classroom."

Anzu and Yugi got Shizuka and Otogi, and the four of them ran into the nearest classroom. Katsuya and Honda, who were too busy fighting, didn't notice. When the man left and the explosion ensued, they got knocked out.

Meanwhile, in the dark classroom, Otogi was touching someone's hand. He remembered Shizuka being right next to him. Thinking it was her, he blushed as he held her hand, thinking how jealous Honda would be, and commented, "You have lovely hands."

"Was that you who said that, Otogi?" came Yugi's voice.

As Otogi began to caress the hand, Anzu turned on the lights, and it was revealed that Otogi was caressing Yugi's hand. Yugi was staring at him with a horrified expression.

"Ugh!" yelped Otogi, backing away as far as possible.

"Otogi, you pervert, I didn't know you were like that", said Anzu.

"I'm not! I thought he was…"

"It's okay Otogi, you think that you actually have a chance with me, you and Honda both do, I understand. But for future reference, my hands smell like lavender", said Shizuka.

Anzu and Yugi sweatdropped.

"Noted. Heh. I'll bet Honda doesn't know that", said Otogi, more to himself than anyone in particular.

"No, actually, he's known for the past two weeks."

"WHAT? Shizuka…why would you tell him something like that?"

"Why would I tell you something like that? I like to taunt you two. You are such idiots that you think I'll actually go for you", Shizuka replied.

As she flipped back her brown hair and flounced out of the room, Anzu and Yugi thought they heard the buzzing sound of rejection as Otogi gazed after her, openmouthed.

"She totally wants me!" he said, then followed her out. Anzu put her head in her hands.

"What a moron…"

"I never thought Shizuka played so cruelly with boys", Yugi said, "Do you think like that too, Anzu? If you're mean that means you like me and if you're nice that means you don't like me?"

"Of course I like you Yugi, you're my friend."

"I meant…_like_ like me." Blushing, he said hurriedly, "Oh, I think I hear Jonouchi and Honda waking up, I'll go see if they're all right, bye!"

Anzu stared after him, wondering why boys had to be so confusing and the reason that they were incapable of expressing their feelings to a girl.

-----

Meanwhile, Jonouchi sat up and looked around. He was in a very strange place indeed.

"Where the hell am I? Shizuka? Yuge? Anzu? Honda? Otogi…wait, I don't even like him. Where did you all go?"

He was in the middle of a busy highway, which he didn't even realize for a minute, until he saw the huge truck coming towards him, the headlights shining across his face, as it came so fast it couldn't stop in time…

-----

Author's Note: Well, that's Chapter 2! Hope you like! I've reduced the language, and left a few cliffhangers. I do love doing that.


	3. The New Girl

Author's Note: Glad people actually like it…I'm a comedy writer, I have to add in funny parts.

By the way, in case you haven't noticed, in this fic, Anzu and Yugi have feelings for each other. Out of curiosity, do you think I should take their relationship any further?

Suggestions for things you'd like to see in the future (including pairings) are always welcome.

-----

Jonouchi remained there, too petrified to move, when a man in black appeared in front of him suddenly. The next moment, the image of the highway vanished.

The two were in the middle of complete nothingness. There was nothing but darkness, pressing on all sides.

Two lights passed through the black, however, one silver, one gold; the glowing grains of sand from the hourglasses.

"This is what will happen if you do not return the time machine and allow me to destroy it", came the man's voice.

"But…dere's nothin here", Jonouchi replied.

"Precisely. If you keep it, you will be transported to a variety of places, and screw up the timestream so much that you will completely unravel the fabric of time and space, single-handedly."

"You're da one who made dese thing. Why do you want to destroy them if you made them?" Jonouchi asked. The man sighed.

"Ok, here's what happened. I am William Schroeder, a scientist from Germany who was hired to come to Japan and work on a project. One night I stayed late, and discovered how to master time. I made six time machines---"

"Six? I thought you made three."

"No. There were three that I never told the press about. At various points in the future, those get taken. I don't know the exact identities of all those who took them, and I'm trying to track them down one at a time. At the time when I made that last fusion, and found out the machine worked, I thought very highly of myself and believed my contributions would change the world. Later, I realized that my contributions _would_ change the world---but not for the better. I know now that time should not be meddled with. Sometimes it is not best for us to see our futures, or journey to the past. We should remain in our own time, accepting what has happened and looking forward to what will come."

"Well, I---" But Jonouchi did not have time to finish his response, because he had just disappeared again.

Cursing, Schroeder turned to his time machine, set some coordinates, and vanished.

--

Back in the present, Katsuya and Honda had regained consciousness, and the gang was heading to their first-hour class.

"Hey Anzu, I have a question", said Katsuya, as he matched her long strides.

"Yeah?"

"What do we have for first-hour again?"

"You mean you can memorize the lunch menu but not remember your classes?"

"Anzu, I only rememba useful things."

Anzu disguised her snort as a cough, and stopped at a water fountain as an excuse. After taking a drink, she turned around.

First her eyes met with the spiky purple hair. Then her gaze met that of Yugi's.

"Oh, hey Yugi, you don't have to wait for me. You go on ahead."

"Anzu, there's something I need to tell you."

"Well, what is it, Yugi?"

"I…" He blushed now, staring at the floor. "Anzu…I…"

"You want me to go to class with you", Anzu replied, to spare him the embarrassment. She knew how he felt about her, and knew how shy he was.

"Uh…yeah, sure, let's go with that!"

They walked along for a little bit. When they stopped at Anzu's locker so she could get her things, Yugi asked, "Hey Anzu, what do you think about this whole Jonouchi-being-lost-in-time-and-space thing?"

"I don't know. I hope he's okay. I hate it when things happen to our friends."

"Well, what about that guy in the overcoat?" Yugi queried.

"Oh, I don't know. He looks kind of like one of Kaiba's goons."

"Yeah…hey Anzu?"

"Hmm?"

"Well…" Yugi blushed a little. "Well what if what Jonouchi had really was a time machine, then…well…what do you think the future is like?"

"What do you mean, Yugi?" They were right outside the classroom now.

"Well…I mean…uh…do you ever wonder who you're going to marry or anything like that?"

Now it was Anzu's turn to blush. "Oh! Well…I guess I do sometimes. I---"

Some snickering was heard now from behind the door of the classroom door, which was ajar. It was Katsuya and Honda.

"What are you two doing back there!" Anzu demanded to know, her face completely red, though from embarrassment or fury was left to speculation.

"We were waitin for you two lovebirds to get here", Katsuya replied, "You guys _always_ get to class before us, and we wouldn't want to break the record."

"What record? The record for biggest idiots on the planet?" Anzu snarled, a vein pulsating in her temple, "And I'd like to see your little record keep me from strangling you!"

As Anzu attempted to throttle Katsuya and Honda, Yugi sweatdropped.

Atemu was snickering and Yugi blushed.

A few minutes later, when she had accomplished her business, Anzu marched into the classroom, that vein still pulsating, thunderstorms raging above her head.

In the classroom, Yugi, Anzu, Katsuya, and Honda all went to their respective seats, with Otogi coming in a few seconds later, a dreamy look on his face, as he took his seat in front of Honda.

"What's up with you, Otogi? You have this totally spaced out look on your face", commented Anzu.

"You better not have been with my sister", Katsuya growled. Otogi appeared not to have heard.

"She held my hand", he said, sitting down.

"Are you sure it was actually Shizuka's hand this time?" asked Anzu, smirking. Otogi flushed.

"That was completely accidental!"

Arching an eyebrow, Anzu replied, "Maybe, but the fact that you were _caressing_ Yugi's hand is disturbing."

"Do you have to bring that up? And yes, it was Shizuka, as I escorted her to class."

"WHAT! Otogi, you stay away from my sister, or I'm gonna---"

"Cool it, Jonouchi, can't he walk to class with her? Yugi and I walk to class together all the time", interjected Anzu. There was immediately a burst of muffled snorts.

"What?" Anzu said, looking around at them, "Can't a guy and a girl walk to class without people thinking anything of it?"

"Whatever you say, Anzu", Katsuya replied, turned around in his seat to speak to her, as she sat further back in the room than him.

"Hey Jonouchi, look who's here", said Honda, tapping Katsuya on the shoulder. Katsuya turned to the front, his eyes narrowing as he saw who had walked through the door.

"Oh great, it's rich boy. I was hopin he might go work at his precious company and leave school indefinitely."

"Wow, Jonouchi, that's a big word for you. Did you learn it all by yourself?" sneered Seto Kaiba, who had heard Jonouchi quite easily, as the latter had a rather voluminous voice.

"Keep walkin, Kaiba!" Katsuya snapped.

Smirking, Kaiba went to his desk, setting his briefcase down on the floor with a clatter. Before he sat down, however, he managed to get the last word in.

"It's not even worth my time to talk to you, you mutt."

"MUTT! KAIBA---"

"Sit down, Jonouchi", said the teacher, who had just strode into the room. Katsuya, who had jumped out of his seat, sat down, though he was still glaring at Kaiba.

"You two have some serious issues to work out", muttered Anzu.

"Now, today we learn about feudal Japan", the teacher droned.

It was shocking that the woman could accomplish a feat like making butt-kicking samurais sound boring, but she did, and quite well.

Otogi was flipping a die up in the air, though when it accidentally hit Ryou Bakura in the head, he stopped.

Honda was sprawled across his desk, sleeping in a pool of his own drool.

Yugi was pretending to take notes, but was really writing love poems about Anzu, things that he would never, _ever_ let her see.

And Katsuya was flicking bits of paper at Anzu, the only one who was paying attention somewhat. As she started to reprimand him, she noticed something.

"Hey Jonouchi, weren't you all bruised before?" she asked quietly.

"Yeah, why?"

"Because you're not beat up-looking anymore! You must have changed things or something!"

"Well, dat's good…can I still flick paper at you?"

"No."

"Why not? You're so fun to annoy!"

When that vein in Anzu's temple began to pulsate, Katsuya contented himself with pinging paper footballs off the back of Honda's pointy brown head.

There was a knock at the door, and the whole class instantly came back to life. The teacher left. A few minutes later, she returned, a raven-haired teen in tow.

"Class, we have a new student."

Yugi and his friends groaned. One now student's psychotic dark side had tried to murder them all in Death-T, and another had tried to send them to the Shadow Realm on more than one occasion.

"This is Atsuko Kamashi. Atsuko, dear, tell us something about yourself."

"I'm going to banish your minds to the shadows for all eternity."

"Great", the teacher replied tonelessly, "Another practical joker. Well, there's an empty desk back there next to Mr. Kaiba."

Kaiba perked up his head at the mention of his name. Had the teacher called on him? He wouldn't know. He never paid attention in class; he already knew it all. When he saw the girl at the front of the room, however, he figured out that there was a new student.

She came and sat down in the empty desk on the left side of him. He smirked, knowing that Anzu would almost immediately try to recruit the girl to her club.

--

Jonouchi staggered to his feet. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a ninja came at him.

The boy sighed. Why did things always have to come after him when he was transported?

Grinning, he held up his fists. If there was one thing he knew he could win at, it was a fight.

-----

Author's Note: Well, I introduced two new characters, as you can see: Kaiba and my Roleplaying charrie, Atsuko. Like I said earlier, if there's anything you'd prefer in terms of pairings, then tell me.


	4. After Class

Author's Note: Oooh, Kaiba and Atsuko, never thought of that…well, anyway, later in the story, Kaiba will get paired with someone, though as of the moment I'm unsure of who it should be…I'll sort it out when I get to the part where Kaiba meets his daughter, which will probably be the next chapter or so.

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Chapter 4: After Class

Kaiba's prediction, though a mental one, came true, surely enough. Poor Atsuko had barely walked out of the classroom when Anzu bombarded her.

"Hi! My name's Anzu! So, you're new and all, I bet you don't know anyone. Just so you know, if you ever want someone to hang out with, you can always come over with me and my friends. They're around here somewhere…anyway, you've heard of Yugi Motou, right?"

Atusko arched an eyebrow at Anzu's erratic behavior, but replied, "Yes, I've heard of him. Champion of some sort of game, right?"

"Duel Monsters, to be precise", said Anzu, still rambling on, "Well, and then there's Jonouchi, Honda, and Otogi, you'll probably have some classes with them. They look tough, but really, they're not. Well, anyway, I just wanted to say that if you ever want some friends, we'll be here."

"Thanks for the offer, but…can you get out of my way? I have to go to class." The ebony-haired teen narrowed her violet-colored eyes. Anzu suddenly snapped back to reality and jumped out of Atsuko's way, blushing.

"Oh, sorry. So what class do you have next?"

"Hopefully not one with you in it."

"Our History teacher was right, you've got a sense of humor. Well, I suppose I'll see you at lunch then?"

"I hope not."

"Well, bye, Atsuko!" called Anzu, who seemed to have the mentality that Kaiba was the only one who _wouldn't _want to be her friend.

"What an annoying dweeb", Atsuko muttered, as she located her locker…which was next to Kaiba's. Atsuko arched an eyebrow at this little fact. First he sat next to her in History, now he had a locker next to her?

"Damn faculty. They did it on purpose", she muttered, cursing loudly when the locker combo didn't work.

Kaiba didn't really pay much attention to her. He didn't care enough to look over at see what was causing her so much strife. But after having to listen to her curse for a full minute, he began to get annoyed.

"---fuckin goddamn locker---" she was mumbling.

"Having trouble?" he asked, his tall form behind hers.

"No. I can handle it. If there's one thing I don't need, it's your help. Look, see, there, it opened. Now if you don't mind, you're blocking the hall", Atsuko replied, not even turning to look at who was behind her. Kaiba arched an eyebrow. Did she not care who he was? She reminded him oddly of…himself. And _that_ certainly wouldn't do.

After school, Anzu immediately scouted out Atsuko.

"Hey Atsuko! I'd like you to meet Yugi", she said, pulling Yugi out of nowhere. Yugi struggled to get away from her, but Anzu had an iron grip on his wrist.

"I don't know about you, but I have things to do…more worthwhile things than meeting your little club. So sayonara." With that said, she turned to walk away, looking back at them only once.

Yugi could have sworn that her eyes flashed red, but the next second, they had resumed their typical violet color, and he was unsure if he had actually seen it at all.

"What do you think of her, Atemu?" he asked his hikari.

"I see nothing wrong with her", Atemu replied. Yugi was surprised with this answer.

"Oh, so you think the lunch ladies are evil, but not her? We definitely need to keep an eye on her."

"Sure, do what you wish, Yugi. If you ever need me to duel a Shadow Game, I'm here."

-----

Author's Note: A very pointless, very short chapter all together. The basic point of this one was to show a little Anzu bashing for her obsession with friendship…anyway, the next chapter'll be good, so stick around. And don't forget, Kaiba will get paired with someone soon, so tell me your suggestions!


	5. Saronu

Author's Note: Ok, here's Chapter Five. Enjoy.

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Chapter 5: Saronu

Seto Kaiba sat in his office, cursing after reading a paper that had just come in, then reverting to his laptop. It was approximately five o'clock, and the blue-eyed CEO was nowhere near being even a third of the way finished with the day's work.

There he was, sitting at his desk, harmlessly doing his work, when he heard a sound like an explosion, and everything went black.

--

Seto opened his eyes, only to find himself staring into the face of a girl who appeared to be around his age. Trying to comprehend what had happened, he sat up, to find that he had fallen out of his chair. He stood, and the girl's unlinking eyes followed him.

"You're really tall. You didn't look near so tall when you were on the ground", she commented.

"Who are you, what do you want, and how did you get in here?" he snarled.

"My name is Saronu. How I got here is of no consequence. I'm looking for Seto Kaiba. Do you know where I might find him?"

It was then that Kaiba's rather large ego took hold, as he replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Seto Kaiba! Nice try. I've seen many fangirls try that."

The girl named Saronu blinked, responding with, "You have fangirls? You're Seto Kaiba? Well, everyone always did tell me I looked like you. So where's Mom?"

Kaiba stared at her, confused. 

"What are you rambling on about? I have no wife, and I don't know where your mother is, kid, why don't you go look for her and leave me alone."

At this bit of information, Saronu muttered, "Oh, shit, I must have gone back too far…"

"You're beginning to irritate me. Leave, before I get security in here."

"You wouldn't do that to your own daughter, would you?"

Kaiba took a moment to comprehend what she had said.

"Daughter? What is this, some kind of joke. I'm only sixteen. I have no wife, and I have no daughter."

"Sixteen? Wow, I went back _way_ too far, you're the same age as me. You may not have a daughter now, but you have one in the future. My name is Saronu Kaiba. I come from twenty-five years in the future. See this?" She pulled out an hourglass with luminous blue grains. "This is a time machine. It's invented in the future, and I stole it to come to the past."

Kaiba blinked, then smirked. He would play along with her little charade, just to amuse her.

"So why did you come back to the past?"

"To meet you."

Her answer confused him, and her appearance disturbed him. She _did_ look a lot like him. Perhaps the long brown hair going down to her mid-back wasn't as dark as his, but those eyes definitely carried some resemblance to his. His vivid blue eyes looked on hers. He felt weird. It was as if his eyes were on another person.

She was definitely a serious, more somber person, another resemblance. But he couldn't dare believe something as preposterous as someone from the future.

"If you are my daughter, then why do you need to come to the past to meet me?"

"Because in the future you are dead. I stole a time machine. I was too little to remember you, and I came to the past with one goal in mind. But I had second thoughts, so I decided to meet you, to see if I should continue forth with my plan or not."

"And what might that plan be?" he asked, smirking.

"To make sure you never exist", Saronu replied quite seriously.

Kaiba arched an eyebrow. Why did she hate him so much? He had never so much as seen her before, and here she was wanting to make sure he never existed.

"And why would you want to do that?"

"Because you ruined my life. You've ruined so many lives, most of the time simply because of your stupid obsessions."

Kaiba arched an eyebrow.

"And what exactly do you mean by that?"

"You can see for yourself." With that said, Saronu made some adjustments on her time machine. Both of them were engulfed in blue light, then they were gone.

-----

Author's Note: Yeah, not the best chappie, but Saronu is introduced, and the next three are when the real drama is introduced. So stick around!


	6. What if Jonouchi Ruled the World?

Author's Note: Ok, so we'll see what ever happened to Jonouchi before we see where Kaiba and Saronu went.

-----

Chapter 6: What if Jonouchi Ruled the World?

Jonouchi blinked, having just been transported yet again. He was sitting on a lavish carpet, in a large, circular room, sunlight streaming in through a huge window.

A teenage girl entered the room. She had dirty blonde hair, long, sleek, and well-manicured. Her sparkling brown eyes reminded him a lot of Shizuka.

What she was wearing, however, reminded him nothing of Shizuka. The girl's attire consisted of a red miniskirt that was way too small for her, a too-small tube top, huge silver hoop earrings, a chain belt which hung loosely from her waist, and stilettos that she had trouble balancing on.

"I'm going out, daddy, just to let you know. What do you think of this new outfit?"

Normally, he would say she looked sexy, but since she reminded him of his sister, her look disturbed him, and the big brother impulse kicked into gear.

Hey wait a minute, had she called him daddy? What the hell?

"Who are you?" he asked, blinking stupidly. The girl looked hurt and offended.

"I'm your daughter, duh! Just because you rule most of the civilized world doesn't give you an excuse to forget who I am!"

"Daughter? I have a daughter?" he asked, making himself look like even more of an idiot.

"Yes, Sakura Jonouchi, eldest child of Katsuya and Mai Jonouchi."

"I marry Mai?" It didn't utterly shock him, but it surprised him in a pleasing way. And apparently they had a couple of kids together, too. Dirty thoughts immediately began to creep into the boy's mind.

"Who are you?" Sakura asked suspiciously, "You're not my father."

"What're ya talking about? I'm Katsuya Jonouchi. I'm sixteen."

Sakura stared at him, then broke out in a grin. "Wow, you're like, sixteen now? That means you totally understand me then!"

"You're sixteen?"

"Well, no, I'm fifteen. So how does this outfit look on me?" She began to model it for him.

"You look like a whore, now go change."

She frowned, displeased, then said, "I'm going out."

"No daughta of mine---whether she's in da future or not---is goin ta look like a goddamn prostitute!" He now eyed her suspiciously. "You're not a prostitute, are you?"

"No", she replied truthfully.

"Well, den don't dress like one", he replied.

"Mom said she dressed like this when she was younger."

"No, she actually wore what could be classified as clothes. Ya know, as in coverin your body…more than a tiny strip of cloth coverin your body parts?"

"I bet you go for girls who dress like this", Sakura sneered.

The horniness of a sixteen-year-old boy could not be denied, and Jonouchi replied heatedly, "That's not the point! No kid of mine is gonna dress like a whore! Even if it's a kid I've neva met before! Show a little modesty, will ya?"

Sakura opened her mouth to retort, but decided that there was no point in argument. Grumbling, she left the room, cursing very loudly as she went down the hall. When the sound of her whining, mingled with expletives, faded away, Jonouchi stood, preparing to explore the place.

Being Jonouchi, he did not understand the complexity of time travel, that his present was now the past, and the present was his future. He seemed to think that he belonged in this time period, and he did, but not as sixteen-year-old Jonouchi. The forty-one-year-old Katsuya Jonouchi was the one that belonged here.

He also did not realize the magnitude of what he had done, by revealing himself to someone from his future. If it had been anyone than his future daughter, a catastrophe could have ensued, as two Jonouchis met, the time stream was messed up, and the world went mad.

There was a little sound like an explosion, and the scientist William Schroeder appeared behind him.

"I've found you, finally. Now hand over the time machine before the time stream gets messed up too much."

Jonouchi blinked stupidly. Schroeder eyed him.

"Have you encountered anyone here?"

"Uh, yeah, I met dis one girl who said she was my daughta…"

"You told her you're from the past, didn't you?" the scientist asked tonelessly, dreading the answer, and yet knowing what it invariably would be.

"Yeah, is dat bad?"

Schroeder slapped his hand to his forehead.

"You idiot! Of course it's bad! She's just seen her father's sixteen-year-old self. She has no idea how you got here. How do you know she won't tell? You could completely alter the future!"

"She might tell?" asked Jonouchi.

"Yes, wouldn't you? Your friend Anzu indirectly told you that there was another Jonouchi."

"So what do I do? Go and find my future self and tell him who I am before she gets to him?" Jonouchi wondered aloud, then sped down the hall and took a right without waiting for an answer.

He nearly crashed into Sakura, who had just emerged from a room, while he was racing down one corridor.

"You're still here?" she asked.

"Yeah, and I'm gonna find him before you!"

"Who?"

"Your dad!"

"Dad's not here. He's on a business trip…in Bulgaria, I think."

"What's Bulgaria?" Jonouchi asked.

"It's a country", Sakura replied patiently, "A country in Europe."

"Oh. Well, what da hell am I doin in Europe? I need to get my ass back to Japan so I can meet myself! I don't know how long I'm gonna be here…"

Sakura stared, then slowly asked, "Why do you want to meet yourself in the future? Present…whatever."

"I thought it would be cool, but I guess I won't get to, now. So I think I'll go explorin instead, and see what the future's like."

"Wait! There's some stuff you need to know before you go wandering around."

"Like what?"

"Like who your family is, for instance? And what your life is like in the future?"

"Oh, right…I guess dat's important to know, isn't it?"

"Okay, you are married to a woman named Mai Kujaku. You already know who she is, I think?"

Jonouchi nodded, and Sakura looked pleased.

"Well, that's good, I don't have to go into much detail about her then. Except there's a couple things about her that you really ought to be aware of, in case she's different. First of all, she has an avid, borderline obsessive love for the game Duel Monsters. She keeps trying to teach me how to duel all the time."

"Oh, you can duel?" asked Jonouchi.

"Don't get off-topic!" Sakura scolded, "Anyway, Mom also has…violent tendencies."

"What do you mean by dat?"

"Well, she can be kind of a bitch. I know I shouldn't say that about my mother, but it's true. Especially towards the media. She chased them away from the house with a carving knife yesterday. And last week was the chainsaw. And the week before that…that was bad."

Now _that_ was different. In his time, Mai would love all the publicity.

"Also, you have four kids. I'm the only girl, and I'm also the oldest. Rujin is thirteen, and Maku and Maru are ten-year-old brats---I mean twins."

"Is there anything else I should know about them?" queried Jonouchi.

"Uh, yeah, Rujin's the duelist. But other than that, not really. Now, other things you should know---"

"What about Shizuka?"

"Huh?"

"Shizuka! My sister! She's here, isn't she?"

"Oh, her? She's here", Sakura replied. (I don't know the Japanese word for 'aunt', if someone told me that would be nice).

"Anyway", Sakura continued, "You are the ruler of the whole Eurasian continent, plus parts of Africa and the Americas. Oh, and you have Australia and some Pacific islands too. Basically, most of the civilized world. Just so you know."

"How da hell did dat happen?" Jonouchi asked in awe.

"It's a long story. Anyway, you're the wealthiest, most famous person in the world."

Jonouchi pointed to himself. "Me?" he asked, confirming it. Sakura nodded.

Later, Jonouchi made his way to the front door, after cleaning out the refrigerator ("Time travel makes you hungry!"). Still he had not met any future family members other than Sakura. As he opened the front door, however, he was blinded by flashing lights of cameras, and immediately bombarded with questions as the media waited at his doorstep.

"Mr. Jonouchi, _Health & Fitness_ magazine wants to know: how do you stay so young-looking?" asked a woman who had pushed to the front.

"Uh…diet and exercise?" he replied, and the woman---as well as others--- immediately began to write this down. Jonouchi began to regain his confidence, and decided he might as well bask in the glory while he had it.

"And always eat your vegetables!" he proclaimed, "And at least three doughnuts every day!"

The press began to get excited. Apparently future Jonouchi wasn't so eager to talk with them.

"Mr. Jonouchi---" one reporter began.

Mr. Jonouchi. He liked it.

"Mr. Jonouchi, the press understands that you've returned from Bulgaria early?"

"Uh, yeah, but I'm going…uh…I'm going back tomorrow!"

"Mr. Jonouchi, what's your opinion on the Russia issue?"

"Damn Russians! Why do they always gotta cause trouble!"

"Mr. Jonouchi, you are aware that Russia just elected the guy you were supporting as provincial governor?"

"Uh, of course I knew dat…damn Russians, you can always count on them."

"Mr. Jonouchi, what's your opinion on Germany?"

"Uh…it's nice…I guess…"

"Mr. Jonouchi---"

"Shut up, will ya? Don't make me get my wife out here!"

The reporters backed away a little, but quickly resumed their merciless assault.

"GET OUT OF HERE, YOU BASTARDS!"

And then came Mai, twenty-five years older, still attractive-looking. She ran after the media, waving around a very sharp scythe to scare them away.

"The scythe is new", one reporter commented.

"AND TOMORROW IT'S GOING TO BE MY HARPY LADIES!"

Mai turned to face him.

"Oh hello Katsuya", she said cheerfully, "Back from Bulgaria already?"


End file.
